


Out and About (The Queer and There Extended Mix)

by gblvr



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-16
Updated: 2010-05-16
Packaged: 2017-10-09 12:22:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/87292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gblvr/pseuds/gblvr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>To say he wasn't expecting anything when he kissed Cas was an outright lie, but he hadn't expected <i>that.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Out and About (The Queer and There Extended Mix)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [elementalv](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elementalv/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Out and About](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/803) by elementalv. 



> HUGE, HUGE, HUGE thanks go to my betas, Kisahawklin and Meansgirl, for editing and hand-holding above and beyond the norm -- this is a much better story due to their help and intervention, and any remaining mistakes are my own.
> 
> Thank you to the mods of Remix Redux 8 for all of the hard work they put into this year's party; thanks also to elementalv for letting me play in her sandbox -- I had a great time, and I hope you enjoy the end result.

Dean is just getting out of his car when Sam comes out of the house, waving his arms and shooing him back toward the car. He's had a long-ass day trying to teach cheerleaders and prom queens how to change the oil in their cars, and he really isn't in the mood for this, so he just stops in the middle of the driveway and asks, "Okay, what's going on, Sam?"

"Jo's coming over. You've got to leave before she sees you, or the two of you'll be on a date before you know it."

Jo. Of course. She's been at it since before she was even legal, and he's been saying no all along, but she still isn't giving up. He doesn't understand it, because he knows Ellen taught her better than this. Dean sighs, and asks, "What part of 'no' do you suppose she's not getting?"

Sam smirks, and Dean wishes for the millionth time that Sam wasn't so tall, so Dean had half a chance at beating his ass when he acted like this. He wishes even harder when Sam says, "You could always tell her you're gay."

"Sammy."

"What? It's true, isn't it?" He's right, and he knows it, but Dean isn't going to give him the satisfaction of admitting it.

"That's not the point."

Sam rolls his eyes and says, "Whatever. You need to leave now if you're not going to be stuck here all night."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm going."

He climbs back into the Impala, and after he shuts the door, Sam leans in the window, and asks, "You sure you don't want to just tell her you're batting for the home team?" Dean just pushes Sam off the side of the car before he hits the gas and backs out in a spray of gravel.

* * * * *

Dean watches Cas duck a punch and thinks again that he should've stopped in at Stiver's Cafe for dinner. But The Damned Sight Inn has the best burgers in the county, and the best pie in the state, and if he'd gone to Stiver's he wouldn't have been here when Cas stumbled in, looking like the hounds of hell were on his heels. He wouldn't have been able to wave him over, and offer him a seat. He wouldn't have been able to spend the night talking with him, looking at him, _being_ with him, and yeah, that's a bit pathetic, but it is what it is -- he made peace with his feelings for Cas a long time ago.

Dean's already crossing the room when Gabe falls against Cas and starts apologizing, calling him Father Castiel and trying to shake his hand. Dean can hear Cas telling Gabe that it's okay, and to please, please call him Castiel. He sees Mike coming up behind Gabe at the same time as Cas does. And god damn it, Cas pushes Gabe to the side, trying to spare him the hit that's coming, and before Dean can even try to stop it, Mike's punch lands squarely in Cas's stomach.

Cas doubles over and Dean barely catches him before he hits the floor. He can feel Cas's chest hitching as he fights to pull in air, and he rubs his hand over his back soothingly, whispering, "That's it, come on, Cas," until he feels his ribcage expand on a breath. The noise of the bar rushes back in then, Mike apologizing for hitting Cas and Gabe yelling at him and Ellen telling everyone the show's over. Dean looks up then, grateful for Ellen's calming influence, and when he sees people backing off, he pulls Cas to his feet, and helps him walk outside.

He waits until Cas is steadier on his feet before he tries to get him to the edge of the lot where he parked. The cool air seems to be doing him some good, but he still looks like he's going to bring up his dinner, and pervy priest fantasy or no, he's not willing to deal with anyone throwing up in his car.

"How you doing? Not gonna throw up, are you?"

Cas doesn't bother to answer that; he just glares up at Dean. Dean takes that as a good sign, and unlocks the door. "A bar fight's a hell of a way to break out of your shell there, Cas."

Cas snorts before he pushes himself upright and says, "Thank you, Dean."

"For what?"

"For gripping me tight and removing me from perdition."

Dean laughs out loud at that. "I wouldn't go quite that far, but yeah, you're welcome. Sorry about not getting to you sooner. Gabe doesn't usually throw the first punch until later in the night. He kind of surprised me."

Dean opens the passenger door, and gently pushes Cas down onto the seat. He pulls himself into the car, and Dean shuts the door and walks around to the other side.

When he opens the door, Cas says, "I know Michael and Gabriel have their issues, but I never knew they took such -- direct -- measures to express them."

Dean climbs in the car, and says, "To be honest, I think it got worse after you left the Church."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't think either of them ever wanted to show up on Sunday looking like they'd been brawling."

"But Father Patrick-"

"Doesn't know them like the rest of us do. And really? They're big boys -- they make their own choices." He thinks about how he felt when he first realized he wasn't all that interested in women, and says, "One of these days, they'll figure out what they're really fighting about, and they'll settle down."

They're quiet on the drive back into town, and Dean watches Cas out of the corner of his eye -- he looks tired and lost and small, and Dean wants to wipe that all away, wants to see Cas smile at him, at the world. Cas has always seemed a bit melancholy, but Dean thinks it's gotten worse since he broke his vows. No one's really sure why, but the local grapevine is still buzzing about it, months later. Sam delights in telling him all the latest gossip; if even one-tenth of it was true, Dean's pretty sure the Church would have ex-communicated Cas instead of just letting him go.

As they pass the turn for his and Sam's place, Dean realizes he's not positive where Cas lives now that he's not at the Rectory, so he asks, "You live on Washington, don't you?"

"Yes. Near Clairdale Court." Cas looks around, and seems to realize he's nearly home, without his car. "Dean -- my car?"

"We can get it in the morning. Ellen won't mind if you leave it there overnight, and I don't think you're in any shape to drive right now, are you?" Cas looks troubled for a moment, but nods in agreement before becoming lost in thought again.

For the rest of the short drive, the only sounds in the car are their breathing and the soft strains of guitar music coming from the stereo. When they pull up to the house, Cas looks up at the porch and says, "Oh, hell."

Dean chuckles a bit and says, "Never thought I'd hear you swear, Cas."

"My sister." He looks at Dean, his eyes wide and panicked. "I'd hoped to avoid her and Mother this evening by going out for dinner."

"Oh yeah? Why's that?"

"She -- she's been trying to arrange dates for me."

Dean's stomach clenches at the thought of Cas dating anyone. He knows it'll happen eventually, but that doesn't mean he has to like it. He tells himself he has no right to feel that way, and to prove it, he says, "Lemme guess -- Margie Petrelli?"

Cas shakes his head no, swallows hard and says, "Boris Lipshitz."

And what the fuck? Since when Cas is gay? And why did he not know Cas has been dating? Dean can't even think of anything intelligent to say because really, what the fuck, and when he opens his mouth the first thing he says is, "Really? Boris Lipshitz? You can do way better than him. You think that's who's on the porch with her?"

"I — it." Cas stutters to a stop.

Dean's brain is still going in circles - _Cas is gay, Cas is dating guys_ \- and suddenly Dean has an idea. "Tell you what. I'll go in with you, just to keep the lions at bay."

"No!" If anything Cas looks even more panicked, and that makes Dean even more determined to stay. If Cas is dating guys, he wants in on it.

"Anna isn't that bad. She's kind of fun."

"She'll think you and I -- Dean, please. You don't want to go there."

"I'm sure people have thought worse things about me, Cas. And really -- do you want Bozo to get the wrong idea about _your_ intentions?" Dean grins and gets out of the Impala, and Cas follows him slowly. Dean turns around, walking backward and smiling as he watches Cas follow him up the walk.

"Come on, Cas. What's the worst that could happen?"

 

An hour later, Dean is ready to admit defeat. It's actually _worse_ than Cas made it out to be. His face hurts from smiling, and if he ever sees a ginger snap or a tea cup again, it will be too soon.

_"Annelies!" Dean had hugged Cas's mother like he hadn't just seen her the previous Sunday before turning and doing the same to Anna. "Cas didn't tell me you were here waiting for us, otherwise, I'd have had him home sooner."_

Before Cas had a chance to open his mouth and blow their cover, Anna said, "I told you not to worry, Mother. Dean Winchester is perfectly respectable, and you know it." The look she gave Cas over their mother's head promised he'd be paying for that save.

"And you couldn't have told me who was with my baby boy?" Anna just rolled her eyes and let Dean answer.

While his mother interrogated Dean, Cas went off to the living room, where Dean could see Anna taking away a fifth of whisky. He couldn't hear what she was saying until she asked at nearly full volume, "Do you honestly want Dean Winchester to figure out you're gay?"

Dean almost laughed out loud when Cas shrugged and said, "He already knows why Boris was here."

It's late when Dean decides he's had enough, and goes to find out where Cas is hiding. Anna helpfully points him to a door off the main hallway, and Dean bangs the side of his fist against it and says, "Come on, Cas, time to walk me to my car. I'll be back in the morning to pick you up."

Cas yanks open the door and practically walks into Dean. "I'm sure Anna-"

"No need to drag her out of bed," Dean says, winking at Anna, who actually _blushes_.

Cas shoots her a glare that could blister paint before Dean grabs his hand and pulls him down the hall. "Come on. Much as I like your mom and sis, I'm pretty sure they don't want to watch us saying goodnight."

Anna says, "I do!" but Dean ignores her and walks Cas out the back door, into the cool night air. Cas shivers a bit, and Dean feels like shit for dragging him out without a jacket.

"Damn. Didn't think the temperature would go down so quick," Dean says. "Sorry about not stopping for your coat."

"Don't worry about it. The air is helping to clear my head."

And then they're at the car, and Dean leans against the door, still holding Cas's hand. "Yeah, well. Look -- I just wanted to apologize."

"Apologize? For what?"

"For not believing you when you said it would be bad. Should've known you wouldn't lie about a thing like that." Dean looks toward the house before he pulls Cas in close, and says, "But I'm not sorry about doing this," before he presses a soft kiss to the corner of Cas's mouth.

Cas freezes for a split second before he turns his head just enough to meet Dean's mouth with his own, and the kiss goes from soft and friendly to nearly pornographic as Cas parts his lips. Cas moans into his mouth and Dean growls back, and that's when Dean wraps his arms around Cas and turns him so his back is against the car.

He's not sure he should be doing this out here in the open, with Cas's mom and sister watching out the window, but he forgets about anything outside of the feel of Cas against him, the feel of his his hips shifting against Cas's, the solid wall of heat at his front contrasting with the cold air at his back.

Cas is shaking, slipping down the side of the car, and Dean puts a knee between his thighs, holding him up and pushing against his hips, pushing his hard-on against Cas's, and yes, it's perfect and still not not enough, and--

He can't do this. Not here.

He steps back and braces himself against Cas's shoulders. "Um, yeah. Probably not -- I mean -- um. Tomorrow. I'll see you in the morning."

"Morning?" Cas looks wrecked, mouth swollen and wet, and Jesus wept, Dean needs to get out of here before he does something he'll regret.

"Yeah," Dean says, still staring at Cas's mouth. "Say around eight? We can -- um -- breakfast. Then--"

"Car," Cas says.

"Yeah. Car." Dean steps away slowly, and walks around the car. After two attempts, he manages to get the car door open. "Um. Good night, Cas."

Cas walks backward up the drive, nodding and smiling, and Dean's last thought is that he's surely going to Hell for this one.

 

* * * * *

As much as Dean wants to find Cas and repeat last night's kiss _right now_, seven o'clock on a Saturday morning is a little early. So he's in the front yard, under the Impala, hoping that working on his car will help him think. And he knows he needs to think, to handle this right the first time, because if he messes this up he won't get a second chance. He's pretty sure Anna will kill him if he hurts her big brother.

To say he wasn't expecting anything when he kissed Cas was an outright lie, but he hadn't expected _that._ He remembers what it was like as a teenager, the now-now-now of kissing a pretty girl, and how he never wanted to wait for anything. He grew out of that, gained some perspective and a measure of patience the year their parents had died in a car crash -- he'd had to, for Sam.

He was no where near to being ready to be a parent at eighteen, and Sammy had been wild. The arrests were bad enough, but the drugs had scared Dean badly enough that he asked for help. Rehab, a summer at Bobby's -- nothing had worked. He knows now it was Sam's way of dealing with their parent's death, but at the time, he had no clue, and when Father Zachariah had offered Sam a full ride at the parish boarding school in exchange for Dean taking on some maintenance work around the Church, he'd taken it. Sam had settled down after that, gotten himself back on track and earned himself a scholarship to Stanford.

When Sam went off to college, he'd gone, too -- locally, since that was what he could afford. He was a pretty decent mechanic, and he figured he could teach other people how to do it, and that train of thought had led to a teaching degree and a job at the local high school. He continued to work at the Church, repairing their cars and keeping the place from falling down around them, and that's where he'd met Father Castiel Van Engelen -- Cas.

Cas with his bedhead and his oh-so-formal speech and those eyes, so serious and the bluest blue Dean had ever seen. Dean had wanted to kiss Cas the first time he saw him, and that want had never gone away, even though he knew Cas was out of bounds. He told himself it was okay to look but not touch, and he figured that was how it would always be. They were friends, and that was a hell of a lot more than Dean ever expected from anyone anyway....

So yeah, he'd been expecting the rush, the heat, but he hadn't expected it to get so far out of hand that they were practically humping against the Impala, and certainly not in the street in front of Cas's house. He hadn't expected that he would spend most of the night wondering what would've happened if they'd been somewhere more private.

So. The question now is what does he want to do about it? He's still not any closer to an answer than he was last night.

He nearly hits his head on the underside of the car when Sam kicks his foot and says, "Dean!" He slides out and sits up before he asks, "What do you want, Sam?"

"Are you trying to out yourself to the whole town, or are you just that stupid?" Sam squats down next to Dean, and smacks the back of his head as he speaks.

"Uh...what are you talking about?"

Sam rolls his eyes and makes what Dean privately refers to as Bitchface #12. "I'm talking about you excavating Castiel Van Engelen's tonsils with your tongue last night."

Oh. That. Dean figured Sam was going to find out eventually, but he didn't think it would happen this soon.

"Who told you that?"

"Jo called me last night when she got home, and she was pissed because she saw you outside the Van Engelens' house. She said you were practically fucking him against your car."

"Come on, do you really think either of us would do that?" Sam doesn't look convinced, so Dean adds, "In public?"

"So you're telling me you didn't kiss him?"

Dean doesn't even bother trying to deny it.

"Oh my god, Dean, you did! I knew it!"

"I didn't...Cas isn't like that. It was just a kiss. His mom and sister were watching and-"

"Oooh, kinky." Sam's leering at him now, and Dean is a bit skeeved out.

"Ew, not like that, you perv. I rescued him from a bar fight, and drove him home, and when we got there, his mom and sister had Bozo Lipschitz over as some kind of set up, so I rescued him again by going in and pretending we'd been on a date. I kissed him as part of the show."

Sam crosses his arms over his chest and just _looks_ at him.

"Okay, fine. I wanted to do it. And it's not like I'm not allowed to kiss him, not anymore." Dean looks down at his feet for a minute, then back up at Sam. "Pretty sure I'm gonna do it again, too." He knows he looks smug, but he just can't help himself.

"Yeah, I bet you are." Sam stands up and walks back to the house. When he's at the bottom of the steps, he turns back and points at Dean, saying, "You're explaining this to Jo. She deserves that much, even if she is a pain in the ass."

* * * * *

When Dean pulls up to Cas's, he looks up just in time to see the curtain twitch aside. Anna and Cas are at the window, watching him walk up to the door, and he's more than a little nervous already, so yeah, that's not really helping. He rings the bell, even though they already know he's here, and when Cas opens the door, he hears Anna say, "Nice to see he knows how to treat a boy."

Cas flushes, and mutters, "I _will_ kill you."

Anna kisses his cheek, laughing, and says, "Maybe, but not today. Because today, your Prince Charming is taking you out."

Cas's flush deepens and he practically pushes Dean down the stairs, mumbling something about justifiable homicide. He stops in the middle of the walk when Anna shouts something about putting out on a first date, and Dean thinks he's going to go back in, but he just closes his eyes, breathes deep and says, "I'm ready."

"Well come on, then. Day's a wasting, and I've got plans."

"Plans? I thought we were just getting my car."

"Yeah, sure. We'll get there," Dean says as he opens the passenger door for Cas and steps back to let him get in. Before he can though, Dean steps in close and kisses him again. They fit together perfectly, and it's just as good as last night, and Dean leans against Cas, knee slotted between his thighs again, and he can't help himself when he rolls his hips into Cas's. He groans low in his throat and pulls away before things get out of hand.

He just breathes for a second or two, resting his forehead against Cas's. "Good morning."

Cas opens his mouth to speak, but all that comes out is a sad little whimper. Dean chuckles a bit, and gently pushes him down and into the car. Cas collects himself enough to shut the door, and by the time Dean is belting himself into the driver's seat, he manages to say, "Good morning. That -- that was--"

Dean just grins and says, "Yeah, that was, huh?"

Cas doesn't say anything to that, and when Dean looks over at him, he's got his thinking face on. Dean knows it pretty well by now and he knows that Cas is going to want to talk soon, too.

He doesn't have to wait long.

"Dean?"

"Yeah, Cas?"

"Why did you kiss me just now?" Cas watches him, waiting for an answer, and Dean schools himself to not give anything away. And damn it, he must give something away, because the corner of Cas's mouth turns up a bit.

Dean sighs, and says, "Because I wanted to."

And Cas does that thing where he just looks at you. Dean knows why he does it, hell, he uses it on students all the time. And he knows he's going to crack sooner or later, so he saves himself the trouble and says, "And yeah, okay, maybe I didn't have to do it in your driveway-"

Cas just stares at him.

"But you know, why _not_? I mean, it's not like no one knows about you, right? Not with your mom trying to pimp you out to anyone and everyone-"

Cas's eyebrows go up, and Dean realizes how that sounded.

"I mean, come _on_! Bozo Lipshitz? Everyone knows Dottie's mouth is even bigger than your sister's-"

Cas is biting his tongue to keep from laughing now, but Dean figures in for a penny, in for a pound.

"Not to say anything bad about Anna, but, well. She talks. A lot. You know?" Cas's face goes pale and Dean says, "Of course you know."

Cas is silent for a moment before he says, "I'm aware that my sexual orientation isn't as private a matter as I would have hoped to keep it. I was just a bit surprised that you were so willing to announce your own in such a blatant manner."

"'Blatant manner?' Cas, who talks like that?"

"I do. And you haven't answered the question."

Dean pulls off the main road, onto a side road he follows into the state park. He doesn't break the silence between them until he's shut off the engine. He stares out the windshield at the lake, and says, "Look. Last night -- I was just -- I didn't want your mom to think it -- you and me -- was a complete lie, you know? Because she was watching out the window. Her and Anna both. And the way they were standing there, I couldn't just -- I didn't want them to think I was there just to get them off your back. So I kissed you. Only...."

'Only' rings out in the air between them for a long moment, and then Cas says, "Only it didn't quite work out that way."

Dean laughs. "Got that right."

If Cas was anyone else, he'd let it go, but Cas is who he is, and Dean knows he needs to know, so he's not surprised when Cas asks, "So why did you kiss me this morning?"

Dean lets out a heavy breath and says, "Because I wanted to know if I'm a fool, if I messed up our friendship over a fluke or if -- if what happened was real."

"And which is it?"

Dean doesn't hesitate at all; he just leans in and kisses Cas again, and yeah, this is real. As real as the slightly chapped skin of Cas's lips and the smoothness of his freshly shaved skin and the unearthly blue of his eyes and the sinful sound of his voice as he moans. When Cas's mouth opens beneath his, Dean slides across the seat and presses him against the door, kissing him hard. Cas moans again, breathy and long, as Dean catches his bottom lip between his teeth and Dean backs off a bit, swiping his tongue along the swollen fullness before nipping at it again. When Dean pulls away to look at him, Cas opens his eyes and just looks at him -- he looks happy, blissed out and smiling, and Dean touches a gentle finger to the crinkles at the corner of his eyes.

"Dean?"

"Yeah, Cas?"

"I want- That is. I've never...." Cas shakes his head and reaches out to pull Dean in close again. Their mouths are nearly touching when Cas says, "Please." He's still not sure what Cas wants, but he wants to give it to him, and he slides his hand into the hair at the back of Cas's head to tilt his head where he wants it. And now it's Dean's turn to moan as the kiss spirals out of control, as Cas wraps his arms around his shoulders and pushes and pulls and wiggles until he's under Dean, stretched across the seat, grinding his hips up into Dean's even as he's pulling Dean's hips down, and yes-yes-yes, it's almost perfect, just the right side of too hard, but Dean needs to touch him, wants to feel Cas's skin against his.

"Cas, can we? Wanna touch you-" Dean stops and kneels up as much as he can to take off his jacket, and yes, Cas gets it and is unbuttoning his own shirt, then reaching up to push his hands under the hem of Dean's shirt, running his fingers over the smooth skin on Dean's stomach and chest as he pushes the grey fabric up and off over Dean's head.

Cas sits up then, grasping Dean's hips for support, and presses a kiss to the center of Dean's chest. Dean looks down at the top of Cas's head, just breathing for a moment before he cups a hand around the fragile arc of it, cradling it as he pushes Cas back onto the seat. He goes willingly, trust shining in his eyes and yeah, Dean can see something else there, something he's wanted for a long time, even though he's still a bit scared of it. He smiles a bit at Cas and his heart stutters when Cas smiles back, wide and open and full of joy, and Dean has to kiss him again.

Things go a bit hazy after that -- somehow Dean manages to work their pants far enough down that he can wrap his hand around both of them, holding on while Cas bucks under him, voice breaking as he babbles 'yes, please, _Dean_' until he comes, moaning long and loud against the side of Dean's throat, which is what tips Dean over the edge, too. His next clear impression is of Cas licking his hand clean, sucking Dean's fingers into his mouth, scraping over the sensitive tips with the sharp edge of his teeth.

Dean shifts to the side, takes a bit of his weight off Cas before he kisses him again. When they part, Dean is breathless all over again.

"So, that was...." Dean grins at Cas.

And when Cas grins back, and says, "Yeah, that was, huh?", he laughs out loud.


End file.
